Rewritten history of artifacts

http://mith.umd.edu/arguing/admin/items/show/56

This is actually not a painting of a strawberry dessert. This is actually a painting of a UFO from outer space entering the earth’s atmosphere.  While the painting may resemble a strawberry dessert, it actually marks a much more interesting turn of events in history.  One day, while everyone was going about their daily routines, and unidentified flying object entered earth’s atmosphere in broad daylight. It is unsure of where the UFO actually come from, other than outer space.  Before anyone could examine the UFO, it crashed to the ground and burned up in flames.  Angela was an eyewitness to this event, and to keep it fresh in her memory, she decided to paint a picture.  This is the picture she paints, the UFO surrounded by blue sky.  The title dessert makes the event seems less shocking and more interesting.  To Angela, the UFO would translate well into art form if represented by a dessert.  Her actions are indeed very creative.

http://mith.umd.edu/arguing/admin/items/show/103

The title of this picture is “My Angel,” and seems to be about the dog in the picture.  However, this is untrue.  This picture is truly about the carpet that the dog is laying on.  The carpet is indeed the angel in this picture.  This carpet has been passed down in Greg’s family for years.  Because it has been in the family for so long, it seems to have developed mystical powers of its own.  Greg has noticed that as long as the carpet has been in his family, his family has had good luck.  This has been proven because once, they removed the carpet from the house in order for it do go get professionally cleaned.  In the two days that the carpet was gone from the house, everything went wrong.  People kept slipping and tripping in the house,  smoke detectors started going off for no reason,  and a general sense of misfortune clouded the house.  But as soon as they got the carpet back, everything was back to normal.  This event led Greg to believe that the carpet truly is like a guardian angel to his family.

 

2 thoughts on “Rewritten history of artifacts

  1. The picture “My Angel” is not referencing the carpet; the “Angel” is actually an angel! You can see it on the right-hand side in the upper doorway. See? That bright spot of light? That is the angel. Angels are made of light, and can only be seen in their true forms in pitch-blackness because their light is so dim. This one is unusually bright. Greg took this picture in an attempt to prove that angels exist. Angels are usually extremely hard to photograph, and many photographs have been faked, that is why very few people believe. Greg managed to catch this one, for which I loudly applaud him. He was very lucky to see this angel at all, let alone have the time to grab a camera and take a picture of it. He must always have his camera close by, and have a very good eye for photography, in order to get just the right angle so that the angel would show up in the film. Though, perhaps, the angel gave Greg a bit of help. Perhaps the angel is someone he knew? Someone he loved and who loved him, who was trying to offer comfort during a difficult time?

  2. A painting of a strawberry desert? I think not. This diagram was in fact taken directly from a late 19th century medical text-book, where it was used as a visual aid to a segment on the historical extraction of a tennis-ball sized tumor from the leg of an elderly Japanese woman. Listed trivia about the operation indicate the strange banded nature to the tumor, which seemed to have undergone severe angiogenesis at its poles, while remaining largely vessel free around its circumference, possibly indicating that the singular extraction was in fact the conglomerate of a pair of tumors and the surrounding inflamed (but otherwise healthy, or at least treatable) tissue. This is medically unusual, though not necessarily impossible. The operating physician was noted to have sworn profusely at the size of the tumor, until the patient herself was forced to silence him. Later analysis of the text concurs that this was likely meant as a joke, as it is extremely unlikely that the patient would remain conscious through the procedure, even if not properly anesthetized. Additionally, medical apprentices are advised to note the distinctive patterning and coloration to the clotting taking place where the blooded regions meet the glass container. Notes at the bottom of the page indicate that the extremely white color of the tumor are due in large part to the presence of pus in reaction to the perhaps slightly less than clinically sterile implements used. The patient, in the end, survived and maintained use of her leg, though with overall reduced mobility.

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